New Year, New Chow

I’m a huge fan of Lidl supermarkets. Sure, the great Paolo Tullio shops in my local one, and that’s quite good enough for me. Their selection of fruit and vegetables is, at worst, entirely adequate and a good deal of their pre-packed or frozen products are excellent value. I would sooner do the majority of my shopping between there and […]

“I’ll Have A Fiorentina Please, Boss…”

As if we needed any further proof of the gulf in professionalism between Continental football sides and their British counterparts, here’s a heart-warming, heart-saving tale of a dietary reward system that simply wouldn’t work if offered to the Mars Bar and Coke-consuming likes of Keane, Rooney and Terry. The greatest football coach of them all, […]

Cream Of The Crop

Of all the “tributes” to the much-unmissed former U.S. President, Veet‘s timely ad is the most subtly unsubtle. To the creatives who waxed lyrical on this one, garlands and medals all ’round.

Tony Hart 1925 – 2009

Another founding stone of my love for television passed away last weekend. Tony Hart, gentleman, artist and one of the most pristine, softly-spoken examples to children’s TV presenters the world over, has left us at the age of 83. I first fell under the spell of this wonderful man in the 1970s, on the slightly bizarre children’s arts programme, Vision On; […]

‘Allo ‘Allo, he’s Putin on the Ritz

As we’re talking momentous political occasions, wasn’t it lovely to see a rather dapper Vladimir Putin trying to get pally with Ukraine’s Yulia Tymoshenko, while agreeing to a new deal over gas supplies? They’d make a great double act – even if it looks very much like it’s all been done before.

And The Award For Most Surprised Nominee Goes To…

Dear reader, I humbly thank the soul or souls who nominated I Have Grave News in three categories for the Irish Blog Awards ’09: Best Popculture Blog, Best Blog From A Journalist and Best Newcomer. It is with renewed optimism for life and work that I sit here, smiling inwardly, with another pot of coffee on […]

Winter of Discount Tent

Greetings. And I mean “greeting” very much in the Scots’ sense of the word*. I Have Grave News has had a wee holiday, so when better to come back than on the most depressing day of the year? And it’s been such a lovely few weeks, too. What have we missed? Well, the first thing […]

The Road To Hell…

Originally published in U Magazine, December 2007 Like your first love, your first cigar and your first electric shock, you never forget your first New Year’s Resolution. When I was six, I resolved to get to the moon. I’d seen it done on telly and we even sang a song about it in school, I […]

Super Trouper, Pooper-Scooper

Ah, Hogmanay. ‘Tis the season for anyone with a dodgy beard and/or a crappy ’70s hairstyle to pretend they’re in Abba. And that, as they say, is just the girls. Yes, it’s the time of year when hundreds of clearly inebriated people pay good (a.k.a. scarce) money to sit in the function room of a soulless country […]

How Green Was My Hobby?

According to the “special” Christmas Day edition of The Avondhu, the Green Party’s greenest candidate for the 2009 local elections, Fermoy’s Adam Douglas, is “concerned over fishing proposals”. No wonder. It’s almost guaranteed that fishing was his dad’s proposal; like most kids, young master Douglas no doubt wanted to go to Funderland instead.