Well, the self-appointed security ‘gaffer’ has thrown in the towel. As mentioned here last week, my office’s gent’s toilet seat was stolen by person(s) unknown. While expecting our marauding Mr DayGlo Jacket carpark attendant to conduct a thorough investigation via his bluetooth earpiece, no doubt twitching his moustache, Poirot-like, in the process, it seems that the scoundrel responsible has eluded him.
So, here he is, forced into fitting a new one – and, as you can see, it’s a real quality one too. In fact, it says ‘Quality Toilet Seat’ in the instructions, so it must be. Good to see there are many special features involved in the hinges too. All in all, it looks like it ought to be a very comfortable place to hide for the better part of a morning.
Unfortunately, there was no appearance of his Village Idiot sidekick at the time of these photos, but I expect he and his pet hoover were along shortly afterwards to clear up the debris of DayGlo’s labours. So all’s well that ends well.
Well, apart from the culprit evading justice, that is. All the same, if you’re reading this, thieving scum, you’d better beware – our eagle-eyed security staff will leave no seat unlifted in their pursuit of you – and when they catch you… they’re going to tell your mum!