England is (still) not Britain

The arrogance of The English (formerly known as the England football team) and misguided opinion of their own importance continues to show it knows no boundaries or sense of perspective.  Not only have they launched a new and expensive football kit when their popularity is at an all-time low, and even their most stupidly die-hard fans are unlikely to want to buy it, they have returned to the preposterous idea that they are somehow “Britain” by once again manufacturing BLUE shorts.

It always struck me as being the height of imperial ignorance that The English wore blue, a colour which appears nowhere on their flag and has no other reason for appearing than its appearance on the British flag – which is, of course, courtesy of us Scots.  In a way it’s flattering that they’re so keen to include us but I, for one, really don’t wish to be involved.  Getting England to realise it’s not Britain is almost as hard as trying to convince America it’s not the World – but I’m sure we’ll carry on reminding them both.

To add hilarity to their obviously injured pride, The English kit has been designed by former Joy Division sleeve designer Peter Saville – so at least we know what sort of miserablist sounds went into clothing the most depressingly unattractive football team Britain has ever produced.

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4 Responses to “England is (still) not Britain”

  1. I’ve already criticised this vile kit elsewhere as you know. I dislike it for two reasons:

    1. It’s got silly little red and blue crosses on the back that have no place on a sports shirt
    2. It has returned the blue shorts.

    The Union Jack is rarely seen at Wembley these days and that’s right. The English football team don’t represent all of Britain so its presence is inappropriate. The all white with red trimmings kit went some way to addressing the issue of England as a separate identity from Britain and was welcome. The changing of the anthem should have been the next step (for two reasons – 1 it’s the British anthem so an English one, ideally Jerusalem, should have been found. 2 we shouldn’t have an anthem that proclaims the monarch)

    Ultimately though money speaks louder than any political (if it existed) will. Bring out a new kit with snazzy new shorts and kids will badger their parents for it. That’s a lot of money for the FA and Umbro. By comparison continuing with all white ones doesn’t come accompanied by the kerching of tills.

    Shame. Though I guess in the grand scheme of things, rather like the wrapping Kit Kats come in, it’s pretty inconsequential…

  2. I wholeheartedly endorse the use of Jerusalem, Mawders – what a song. I think a lot of, ahem, ‘neutrals’ would rather enjoy that too…

  3. the biggest offender of conflating England and Britain in recent times was Gordon Brown,where’s he frae?
    England being called Britain keeps Scottish Welsh and NI politicians in a job at westminster.

  4. Interesting point, tally – England taking “Britain” on the chin does keep the rest of us out of a lot of international and historic trouble as well, but usually when it suits us. Swings, roundabouts, etc.

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