I’m not one for giving free advertising to any old spooky crank but I feel it’s my duty to give this chap a little exposure. Meet John, who’s evidently the Austin Powers of the parapsychological world; he’s not just a psychic medium and clairvoyant, he’s an international psychic medium and clairvoyant. Just cross his palm with plastic and the fog will lift on “your pathway of destiny”, allowing you to more easily “explore the possibilities of your future”, all from the comfort of your own home if necessary. The boy will even attend your house parties – what could be more perfect and reassuring for those getting on a bit than a clairvoyant turning up at your party to remind you that the dead still hang around and talk to parties? All the same, image is everything these days and it’s a pity John didn’t explore the future possibilities of his own hair loss, allow the fog to lift from his own mirror and listen to the voices from well before the grave:
“Seriously, John, your integrity is being compromised by quite the worst comb over in Christendom”. John, you are our hero. You’re always welcome at our house parties.