Basement Jacks-Gate – problem fixed…

Well, the self-appointed security ‘gaffer’ has thrown in the towel. As mentioned here last week, my office’s gent’s toilet seat was stolen by person(s) unknown. While expecting our marauding Mr DayGlo Jacket carpark attendant to conduct a thorough investigation via his bluetooth earpiece, no doubt twitching his moustache, Poirot-like, in the process, it seems that the scoundrel responsible has […]

Crazy world, crazy guys

Halloween guises suit some people more than others, but surely none better than Aslan. The Dublin band “rocked” Trim during the festivities while dressed as a rather convincing jazz sextet, “accordion” to this photo in the Meath Post.

Another Snore Patrol Best Of, already…

Hard on the heels of their Up To Now compilation, Scotland’s, Norn Iron’s, Britain’s, Ireland’s, Europe’s and SouthYemen’s finest band ever Snow Patrol are set to release a double spoken-word album* of singer Gary Lightbody’s endless platitudes to audiences all over the world. His stock, crowd-pleasing utterances, in which he compliments the size or quality of any given venue […]

‘Mystery’ Of The Basement Jacks

Desperate times call for desperate crimes. But now, another kind of ‘desperate’ have nowhere to turn. In a case that’s baffling even the most astute and eagle-eyed amongst us, the gentleman’s toilet seat in the office block I ‘frequent’ has been stolen. It’s used by at least three separate businesses in the block and also, no […]

Well, I’ll be bugguered

Great crime prevention advice for the good burghuers (sic) of Monaghan in this weekend’s Post. Perhaps the writer of this headline is obsessively over-fond of one my favourite crap jokes:

That Knock apparition in full…

Amazing footage of 5000 people all staring at the sky, many of whom claim they saw the sun “dancing”. If you look closely you can just about make out…

Snark by David Denby

Nastiness Is A Thing Called Snark Sunday Business Post, 11th October 2009 What is the lowest form of wit? What has replaced the golden age of satire, spoof, burlesque and ingeniously dark comedy? According to David Denby, it’s something known as ‘snark’ -a phenomenon he ominously calls the ‘‘angry fanfare attending journalism’s decline’’. Denby is […]

Is this the worst record ever made?

It has to be. Andrew Ridgeley’s 1990 ‘comeback’ single Shake truly is car crash stuff. The video is appropriately nasty, but ignore it if you can and just listen to the song: after the cak-handed, overwrought acoustic intro, there’s this ‘intriguing’ and ‘dramatic’ pregnant pause – during which, it seems, Ridgeley trips up and falls into a drum kit. […]

They Don’t Write Them Like They Used To…

The über stylish German act, Goombay Dance Band, featuring the incomparable Oliver Bendt, performing their only UK hit, Seven Tears. This spent three weeks at Number One in 1981. Wouldn’t happen nowadays.

Easy Food Recipes of the Month!

As I’ve mentioned before, I have a slight weakness for Easy Food magazine, the monthly step-by-tiny-step guide for novices of the fine culinary arts of tin opening, bread browning and kettle operating. The October ‘Halloween Special’ contains some appropriately horrifying dishes with which you can easily ruin even the most voracious of appetites. But before we get all complicated, let […]